An After Dinner Chat

"....So that's when I said to the kids, 'If I die and you have to transport my body somewhere far away, please make sure that I am in an air conditioned vehicle." That was the end of the conversation that I was having with Kevin, when one of the party guests that we were at, sat back down at our table. Then there was an awkward pause. We were at Melrose Makos Fundraising Luau (the Kemas would have been HORRIFIED at the dinner served. That's the last time I go to a haole luau expecting good pork) and the two of us were sitting there talking, with no interruptions, phone ringing, or children fighting, er, I mean, having a heated discussion, with potential assault and battery, while the rest of the guests were outbidding each other on the "silent" auction. There were a lot of nice things up for auction, like a individual swim lesson with Misty Hyman, a signed Larry Fitzgerald football, and 56 Diamondbacks tickets. I guess not many people are rooting for the Diamondbacks right now. But I had put my bids in on what I wanted, like tickets to the zoo, gymnastics lessons, and circus tickets (didn't win the circus tickets. Sad.), and while I am generally a competitive person, I wasn't feeling it. Later on, Kevin was feeling competitive and started bidding on the reserved parking spot. He was outbid by one of our friends, but then made a backdoor deal with one of the ladies that had won a parking spot, so he has a spot to park his monster truck for the meets. I'm pretty excited about that one. We can arrive whenever we want to and pull up and not have to park down the street. That is if no one decides to park there despite the fact that it is a reserved parking spot, because I don't think that there are "Melrose Police" to enforce this. But, I digress. Back to the conversation we were having. I was telling Kevin about Sharon and Bill Gold transporting Bill's uncle, who had died, up to Bountiful, Utah from Phoenix, AZ in the back of Bill's pick up. All I could imagine was the body getting bot and dirty. I know, I know. He's getting buried, so what's the big deal, but I just can't imagine having the body in the pick up, driving with it, stopping with it, and it's creepy. The kids and I were in the car on our way to Arizona's only, and most crowded, aquarium, when Sharon called me to check in with me and tell me this story. So, of course, once I got off the phone, they wanted to know the details, and that's when I told them that I was to be transported in an air conditioned, close topped vehicle. Now it's out there on the world wide web and I don't have to put an addendum in my will. But poor guy at the luau. He was at a loss for words when he sat down for that ending.