Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Hungry Like the Wolf or Why I will NEVER Go Fishing in Sedona Ever Again!

The school district that my children are in have Rosh Hashanah off.  It's a Thursday and Friday vacation for the unorthodox folks, such as the Partridges.  We took advantage of the situation (again, not from The Jersey Shore) and took a drive up to Sedona to enjoy the beauty of nature and atmosphere.  Little did I know that it would be a day that would change my life forever, and be one of those days that I would never be the same after.  We took the kids to a trout fishing pond located north of downtown Sedona, where you put your fishing hook in with a little bait and twenty fish come to snatch it off the hook, and you have to move fast to hook one of them.  We let the kids catch one fish each, since none of us really wanted to eat trout.  I had to help Olivia since the jerking of the fishing rod scared her, so she baited and threw in the hook while I attempted to catch.  It was during a brief respite from wrangling that Dillan said words to me that I can't believe he thought were okay to EVER say to me.  And the only reason why I acknowledged what he said was that he was pointing and he is a teenager and he was talking to me.  Maybe I was caught up in the moment.  That's the only excuse I can think of.  He said "Hey, Mom.  Look at that huge spider over there."  Why did I look?  WHY DID I LOOK?!  If I could go back, I would have yelled at him "Don't you know I am an ARACHNOPHOBE?"  But again, I was caught up in the moment.  And really, how big can a spider get?  I've taken care of people that it was a suspected Wolf Spider bite, and I thought how strange it was that after the suspected bite, that someone would go to the scene of the crime to locate the perpetrator.  I thought "How can they find a spider the size of a quarter?"  Well, if I was a good blogger, which I have never claimed to be, I would paste in a picture of how HUGE they are.  Well, that and I reeeeeeeeealy don't want to Google Wolf Spider.  EVER.  It is not the size of a quarter.  Instead, picture a $100 bill.  Then put another $100 bill next to it.  THAT is the size.  After I looked at it, I knew that I could never go back to the innocence from before.  I froze where I was, because the whole day was now shattered as I knew that it was stalking me. just like the ones that live at my mom's house that wait for me and are hunting me ready to strike and scare the devil out of me (obviously I haven't been scared enough).  BUT THEN!  To make matters ten hundred times worse, Chloe told the fishing manager lady about the ginormous spider, and she said "Oh yeah.  That cute little momma had babies two weeks ago."  (Dramatic pause to let this information sink in.)  My life is now defined by that moment before I saw the Wolf spider to my life after.  It's just a good thing that there aren't any Wolf spiders in the Grand Canyon or else I may never go back again (and if any of you have ANY sense at all, you will not burst my bubble on that one).

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